Last week, I was a complete emotional disaster.   Although still dealing with lots of stuff, I sure am much better this week. In fact, after each visit this week at the hospital I was gaining more and more relief from the confusion and sadness, feeling bad ect.  I think as the babies grew stronger and parents still just so thankful and delighted, I found peace that things were just as they should be. Â
I also went to see Dr. Lloyd this week. He told me not to come for 6 weeks unless I have some concerns or pain ect.  This is my first c-section and I am not familar with how I should be healing.  Also, I worried that maybe I did a little too much the first 2 weeks, so for my sanity I felt to I should go to a 2 week post op visit.  Turns out incision is healing just right and all else seems to be good.  I asked him about exercising and he said not until at least 6 weeks after delivery.  I am glad I asked because normally if I am feeling good I just get out there run and stuff.  He said healing on the inside could cause a problem. Got to be patient just 3 more weeks and I have milk to pump to keep me occupied in the mean time.
On Wednesday or was it Tuesday (oh the days are just running together), I went to visit babies and drop of milk.  Little did I know there would be suprising big news, B told me that the babies were cleared to go home on Thursday..the very next day!!  Talk about some of the best news I have heard in a very long time.  Those twinkies amaze me and I am so glad they are strong fighters, who sure were anxious to get be born and meet their mommy and daddy.   Less then 3 full weeks in the NICU, God sure is good 
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I got a text from B on Thursday around 1pm, she said they were leaving in 30 min!  So my family got in the car and headed over to the hospital. I did not want to be the reason they got held up.  When we got the hospital they were not exactly ready to exit.  A nurse was showing B how to mix some formula with the breast milk for added nutrition along wiht portion sizes.  Then, the babies needed diaper and wardrobe changes.Â
E changed and ready to go home!
B changed and ready to head home!
 Poor D, was still finishing up last minute work issues over at the hotel and was not there ready to head out either.  B was busy trying to pack all of the twin’s items from the hospital, she had several plastic bags just stuffed with things.  She had to have a seperate cart for all of it.  When D, did arrive it was finally time to get the babies into the car seats.  It was fun to watch the parents work on getting them in. The babies are just so tiny and the straps had to be adjusted and really the little cuties were just swallowed in the seats, so cute.   No worries though because babies sure grow fast and they will out grow the car seats before you know it   After about an hour or longer all was packed and ready to go.  Just a little taste of how crazy it will be to get organized and try to head out the door with two bundles of joy! Â
Me, E, B and Mommy B
Here is the twinkie train exiting the hospital doors and headed for the car….
I tried to keep it together, but the overwhelming joy just had me tearing up.  All my worry, and guilt of the early delivery now seemed just pointless and selfish.  The babies are going home with the most special parents and the journey was a success.  The goal was to carry and deliver the twinkies and it happened and is so beautiful and words are never enough to truely express the wonder of it all.
Cait Said:
on January 3, 2012 at 6:20 pm
I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that! As I read your post I couldn’t help but focus on your pent up emotional trauma from this experience and how hard you are trying to overlook it with “silly me” comments. You have every right to feel betrayed and hurt and traumatized from your experience. As a woman who dealt with birth trauma I can only offer my deepest sympathies to your grief at everything lost during this experience. I hope you can find some commfort and support through your local ICAN chapter, or even just online support. I’ve met many wonderful people who have really helped me get through it. I dealt with a lot of my emotional issues from my experience with my next pregnancy and really needed my doula to help me get through it confidently. The most relief I got was after I put it all on paper and sent it ot the highest high-up guy at the hospital. There is absolutely no excuse for the treatment (and lack there of entering the hospital) that you received. As happy as two healthy babies are, you can not overlook your emotional wellbeing. This was a major event in your life and you should address it and heal from it much like you’re healing from the surgery. Slowly, and with help. I wish you the best of luck on your journey, it’s not over yet. If you ever need to talk about it, or just be heard, please feel free to email me.
Also, being currently pregnant with twins as a surrogate I am very greatful you shared your story. It is reassuring to know that only 2 weeks ahead of where I am now your babies were ok and are happy and home now. What a blessing and happy ending to your story. And GO YOU for pumping for them, how awesome!
denisek Said:
on January 4, 2012 at 4:27 am
Thank you for your taking time to write. Your kind words mean alot
All deliveries are unique but yes this one has taken its toll on me. I have so much going on my head all day long, still after 3 week have gone by. I do try to be positive, surely the hospital did the best they could…in the end the babies and I are all healthy. I did speak to someone in charge over the phone the day I came home from hospital. I need to meet with he in person this week that will help me and others. So I guess you are on SMO? Can I ask what your screen name is? How exciting, you are on a surro journey and preggo with twins! Is this your first journey? You are 30 weeks? I wish you the best and I hope you feel well. I know you said you are there if I need to chat but please know that I am here for you if you need it 
You can e-mail, call or text if you want 281-435-6388.